When they want it but afraid to admit it...

I guess it's this thing called ego.
I admit my egoistic nature do pisses off lotsa ppl every now and then. And yeah, it pisses off me too when I'm in one of those reflecting session. But sometimes, I do know my limits. Yeah, knowing anything doesn't mean I'm doing something about it.

But, when people try to force their minds into you, their words into you, their actions into you, my ego would be my greatest shield, my strongest armor. I might be gullible at times, but there are things I'd think through, sometimes it would take months. And in the process, I'll hurt others like nobody business! But when people force me into their way, respect for them will be lost. No matter how they'd apologize or no matter how they tried to make up for it, it'll take me time to forget about it, sometime years.

***

A good friend of mine got a call.
A call to ask his help to persuade me.
It's either they are playing dirty or they just want to make up for it.
No matter how strong my feelings for the idea, it is as strong as how I'm against it.
Call me egoistic, but that's how I protect my self when I dun have anyone to depend on.

I'm thinking, procrastinating, weighing, waiting, and having a dilemma.
I guess I should find what strength I have left to go on.
Just when you need a battery and none is available.

I might look for a foreign charger.

I'm spent of this kind stuff.
But since this is what they want, I'm giving it to them 3 folds!